Serving on a jury is interesting. My life is greatly about puzzles, and this is one on a grand scale.

My apartment is coming together. I finally have some artwork on my newly painted walls. Bringing some color and style into the space. Makes me happy. It's feeling a little grown-up, but that's part of me, too. As long as the whimsy doesn't leave the space it'll be ok. Audrey assures me that even if I tried to avoid it, something eccentric would creep its way into the space. I guess that's true, based on others' reactions to my stuff.

I really don't think I'm eccentric at all. But I suppose that's an external description... or at least it should be. No one should tell me that's how they think of me.

My current picture of citizenship:
-- I'm serving on a jury of a criminal case. Unlike most of my friends, I was not interested in trying to get off the jury. If I'm ever on trial for anything, I would want intelligent, working people to decide my verdict.
-- I'm horrified that San Francisco is spending "tens of millions of dollars" on increased security measures to protect our landmarks at the same time I'm helping nonprofits who provide key human services to prepare for severe budget cuts.
-- Election signs are starting to go up around the city and I didn't even know an election was coming. I worry that people may be less willing to vote after the last fiasco when we ended up with our bellicose president.

.... I'm mostly feeling exhausted.

currently sitting in a cafe, working on my own laptop, drinking a nice cabernet. It's nice to have fully restored my "got no strings" life... laptop, wireless network card, and a wireless network at home. Slowly exploring all the cafes in the city that offer wireless DSL.

I have to admit that it was more than a little disorienting to see that a bomb was exploded in the airport out of which I had flown only 2 days earlier. A convoluted sentence for a convoluted situation. Four bombs went off in the greater Davao area that day. Not a good time for my family to be in the hotel business there.

Desperately trying to get oriented. I'm behind in work and distracted by everything that's happening in my world. Must focus on something.

Currently at the Tokyo Narita airport. I think I've just discovered the breaking point in the ratio: 96 hours on the ground is not enough to balance out 48 hours in airplanes and airports. Next time I break 100.

Looking forward to a little G&T and some shuteye on the next flight. Tummy's all filled with yummy unagi and soba... mmmmmm.....

rereading my last post...clear that I'm trying not to get maudlin. working on that a lot right now. Most of the time it works. This morning spent a long time looking at Mt. Apo, watching the clouds gather. Taking that space felt good.

I'm in the Philippines. Many things stay the same (like the music). Many things change (like new stringent smoking laws, friends no longer living here, my grandmother dying). It's always odd, but perhaps underscored by only being here for 4 days with 2 days of travel. Before I left SF, I came up with a new goal: to spend 7 days in a row in SF. It's a big one, but I'm going to try...

Elvis was on my plane. He's fat and wears a tacky red jacket.

The president of the Philippines sent flowers to my grandmother's memorial. Am I really part of this family?

Currently I'm really hungry so this will be short. Time for some food I can only get here, like a banana cue from a street vendor.

Been a long time since I've posted.

I've realized an odd thing: I'm having difficulty getting things into my hands which are actually mine. I've ordered a new mattress to replace the one I have, but they won't give it to me until I manage to get a spot of dye off the old mattress. Through some idiotic sales behavior, the laptop I thought was ordered and on its way actually wasn't... I hear there's one coming now. A large paycheck was to be delivered to me by a friend, but it seems to have gone through 3 other friends' hands (who were being helpful messengers) on its way to mine; tomorrow I'm supposed to get it.

This is all feels odd and fairly frustrating.

today's thoughts are tumbling around

can't believe how much attention is being focused on the ads during the superbowl. Definitely the game was nothing to be excited about (Raiders never should have moved to LA, only to return in shame), but still. Seems silly to give NPR time to talking about advertising...

In a bit of a whirlwind career-wise. Seems I have a lot of opportunities in both my documentary and my HIV careers. Pretty damn amazing. Just need to buckle down and do work, then figure out what I want to do next.

I'm a lucky lucky girl.


oh -- pretty cool that my two doc pics from sundance were the audience award (My Flesh and Blood) and grand jury prize (Capturing the Freidmans) winners. Then I got all excited about The Station Agent, and it won the audience award for drama. Pretty excellent.

Greetings from Sundance!

I can't believe I'm actually here! Wandering around, getting introduced to some really cool directors, producers, composers, everyone. Talking like I'm in the industry, telling everyone about the next doc. Makes me feel like I really am going to be part of this world. I'm excited.

Stuff to see:
Capturing the Freidmans. This is an incredible doc. I can't tell you too much about it, because you really should experience it. Also, My Flesh and Blood, a beautiful and fun doc about an amazing family.

That's it for now. Have to go see another. More later.

Yesterday my friends moved all my stuff into my new apartment. I'm really in it now! Feels like a good start to the year. Just found out last night that it's also the year of the ram/sheep/goat this year on the Chinese calendar. My year. I read once that the year of the goat is the year in which peace treaties are signed, and when long-standing disagreements are resolved. This doesn't sound likely with our current administration, but I can hope. The goat is frequently called in to be a diplomat. The goat is also very artistic. I'm hoping for a year of peace in which I make art. On the other hand, I just read that I "would be best as an actor, gardener, or beachcomber." Those are solid career paths...