New Blog - co-created with Cyan

If you don't know Cyan, then your world is not yet as bright as it will be once you've met her. I am honored and more than a little psyched that she has decided to start a new site & blog featuring the two of us, the Sexiest Geeks Alive. Andrew Mager joined in and helped design it to kick it off. It's a place for us to celebrate the sexy geeks of the world, and also to blog randomly about our ideas. Come check it out. I'm very very (did I mention VERY?) excited about it.

I wonder and will never know

Three days ago it was my mother's birthday. Or, more precisely, it would have been.

Today when I went out for lunch I overheard a very intense (and supportive) conversation between a mother and her daughter about the daughter's difficulties with her boyfriend. I pictured myself in that conversation with my mother and wondered if I would have had that kind of open talk with her, if I would have sought out her advice.

A few minutes later, I realized with a surprise that I'm only a handful of years away from the real possibility that I could have been the mother in that conversation had I stayed in one particular relationship and had children as my partner desired.

I walked home increasingly thoughtful, bordering on despondent, considering how I have been cut out/have cut myself out of a relationship which so many around me herald as one of the most important in their lives: between mother and daughter. I know it's not everything, and I am not knocking the relationship I have with my Dad, but I hear that it's different and it makes me wonder.

small act, big reaction

This morning I needed a little jolt to get me started so I stopped by Peet's. Ahead of me in line was a man in his late 50s/early 60s. He had stooped shoulders under his outdoorsy jacket, was slightly balding, and gave an impression of trying not to take up too much space. As we moved closer to the registers, he was peering intently at the pastries, carefully considering his options. I looked into the case and noticed that there were two pieces of banana nut bread left, my morning snack of choice there. The man stepped up and, in a notably quiet voice, ordered one slice of it and tea. I was called to the other register and placed my order (thinking "that's the last slice!") and coffee. Our two cashiers disappeared for a moment, kneeling behind the low case to reach into the bottom shelf. I was handed my order and while waiting for my change I heard the man's register girl apologize to him, saying "I dropped the last piece of banana nut bread. Would you like something else?" The man looked confused and started to look again into the case. I offered my slice back to his cashier saying, "He ordered it first. Take this and I can get something else." My cashier heard me right away, but it took a few moments for the other folks to catch the man's attention so he would turn around. By then another Peet's staff person had joined in and a couple of people in line had also become involved. The guy at my register said my action was "a customer of the year thing to do!" and everyone seemed really surprised.

It was such a small act on my part, but I was struck by the reaction it caused. I confess that I enjoyed breaking up the rhythm of the order/pay/order/pay that is the mark of busy coffee shop efficiency. I also liked making a few people smile. I thought how different it would be if we would all do little kindnesses like this every day. I saw it as an opportunity that I couldn't pass up.

I was joined at the milk bar by the man who asked me shyly, "What did you end up getting?" I told him, "A rasberry scone. They're really good, too." He smiled at me. I returned the smile and said, "Have a great rest of your day!" And I really meant it.

Nerdcore For Life Trailer

This is a film I'm eager to see! I'm in a real nerd love moment right now!